That Was The Week That Was – Week 11

The week began with a rare piece of good news for Mrs May, but soured faster than Larry’s milk left out in the sun, in fact it didn’t just sour, it ended up smelling riper than a piece of Stinking Bishop, which presumably the vicar’s daughter will know all about.

The Lord’s amendments were comprehensively rejected by the commons, but not before former attorney general Dominic Grieve QC told the front bench that their plan, not to give parliament a meaningful vote, was “frankly deranged.”

After showing Hezza the door and leaving the Lord’s in no doubt that the #Brexitscam Bill was to be placed before the Queen, unadulterated, the Lords folded like a cheap suit as Parliamentary cut and thrust was played out with nothing more than toy swords.

The following morning, the smile was wiped off the Prime Minsters face faster than money from a Tory election receipt. Nicola Sturgeon announced the SNP’s intention to seek a second referendum due to the intransigence of the prime minister – Nicola had given her the benefit of doubt and ended up in the same boat as the rest of us!

The opportunistic May had her weekly mauling from Jezza, who finally decided to shut her up over the repeated and ridiculous claims that Labour would bankrupt the country – by borrowing half a trillion pounds – when the Conservatives have already borrowed twice that amount and by 2020 will see the country £2 trillion in debt.

The previous chancellor, and newly installed editor of the Evening Double Standard, decided to keep a low profile as Corbyn rammed it all home with the old, “they’ve borrowed more in seven years than every Labour administration has put together.”

With a flustered May left with nothing more to offer than lists of what Labour hadn’t done, poor old ‘Spreadsheet Phil’ looked like a man about to be thrown under a Tory battle bus.

In a humiliating climb-down, Phil set-aside his NIC’s increase, leaving a £2bn black hole that nobody, including Mrs May, wanted to explain about; but this is the 21st century Tory party on the rampage, lie after lie told about schools, the NHS and Social Care and all they do is tell ‘in’ jokes that only they laugh about.

May wasn’t laughing when the Electoral Commission handed the Tories a record fine for filing incorrect election expenses.

Using the defence that Labour and the Lib Dems had also earlier been fined wasn’t going to deflect from the seriousness of the allegations which has seen twenty MPs investigated by the police and has had files passed to the CPS.

With by-elections a distinct possibility, reducing, perhaps obliterating the governments thin majority, Nigel Farage is lining himself up  for another session of abuse in South Thanet – he may even stand for MP!

Hezza wasn’t going to give the unelected one the last word, being old school, he dropped her a line which finished with, “you have changed your mind since the excellent speech you made in the Referendum campaign arguing we should remain in the European Union. I have not.”

I’m guessing we’re all with Hezza here, we haven’t changed our mind either; the present government are just a bunch of opportunists who’d stab their colleague in the front, the back and in the side to get the power they crave; isn’t that right Govey?

Michael ‘stabber’ Gove